One Sided Phone Conversation II

I know it is.

He don’t get two years backpay.

What?  Why?  Uh huh.

Well, she can’t go on Thursday- miss three days of school that’s all there is to it.

See, it’s hard for her.  It’s hard for her to get caught up when she’s been gone.  It’s hard to get caught up in high school.

Mmhmm.  Yeah. It’d been better if it coulda been in the summertime.

Yeah.  Yeah.  Yup.  Yeeuup.  What’s the sleeping arrangements?  Where’s she gonna stay?

Is that where your daughters are stayin?

Mmhmm. I thought Marsha wanted to stay with Natalie.

Uhhuh.

Where they catch the airplane at?

I just hate her missin’ school.  She’s having a hard…

You don’t understand how much homework she has that she gets. Even when she’s not doin’ anything she still don’t wanna do her work. Mmhmm.   

Okay, I’ll call, let’s see here, I think I got your mom’s number.  I’ll call you Monday.  Mmkay.  Mmkay.  So who’s gonna bring her back once it’s Monday?  Mmhmm.  Mmhmm. 

Where d’they live? In Omaha?  Oh, okay.

Okay, well I’ll talk to Marsha and call you on Monday.  Mmhmm.  Yeah. 

[Chuckles].  Mhmm.  [Chuckles]. 

So where’s the wedding gonna be?  That where the party’s gonna be too?  Mhmm.

I just don’t want her to feel left out.  There’s all you guys drinkin’ and then there’s Marsha. 

Yeah.  Uhhuh.  Yeah.

Well that’s good. 

They said he prolly won’t find out for 90 days.  Or less.  They wanted to make me the payee over him.  Because they don’t like to give social security to people who drink. 

Naw naw, his truck’s broke down.  So his mom and step-dad will be pickin’ him up to come get Marsha. 

And another thing, I go, I go, umm, I go you guys are drinkers too and she’s gonna be around that.  He just said she’ll be with Natalie cuz she don’t drink.  She might be able to come back on Saturday with Melissa.  Then if not Saturday it’ll be Sunday and if not Sunday, Monday. 

One Sided Phone Conversation: John with his Sister

I started writing down everything my coworkers say during personal phone calls.  I figured if they were careless enough to chat away with me in earshot, they had forgone their right to privacy.  I present the first installment of One Sided Phone Conversations.

Today: John's side of a conversation with his sister about friction in planning his wedding.

It looks like I need to stick up for myself.

Afraid of her?

She just thinks I don’t care. 

That’s just how I express myself.

[Lots of yeahs and okays]

No I haven’t involved you in any of this.

Yeah.  

 Okay.

I’m glad I called you first. 

Yeah. Well, we didn’t cut her friends, they just weren’t on the list.

If she would have told me at random like that, they wouldn’t have been sent out.

Well, and that’s…

That was the only thing I tiptoed around her like that.

Well what else was there?

Mmhmm

Cool.

Alright.

I’m just trying to make peace by her.

Just keeping the peace.

Yeah.

I mean, in a sense yes, but no. I mean, I agree they should be invited, but should we invite Mark and Bob’s kids?  I didn’t know the neighbors until [blah blah] at Mom’s work.

He was gonna tell her in a nice way they were trying to keep the numbers down.

And we are and we have to. 

Whatever happens happens.

I know.

Yeah.

People are gonna do what they’re gonna do. 

She just couldn’t sleep.  It was bothering her.

[Mumbles]

I think in a week she should be fine. 

We’ve got a rehearsal dinner tonight and a wedding tomorrow.

Oh, I know, I know.

I think she’s mad at Mom because she knows we had to cut and she invited them anyway.  There’s room for about 200 people.  Some people will probably stand.  So if we get like, 220, I’m sure the capacity is slightly larger than 200. 

She’s just stressing out about everything.  I don’t know if she’s just blaming it on this or if…

Honeymoon!

Yeah. 

That’s it.

Okay. 

[I had a phone call and had to stop listening for a few minutes.]

Mmhmm.

Is it cause she’s a brat?

Oh, okay. 

Yeah.

Uhhuh.

Nice.

Uhhuh.  Cool.  Well, now you know. 

Cool dill, pickle. [I can’t believe he actually says this.  It's not the first time I've heard it from him.]

[Long pause while I stopped paying attention]

I think that’s what she’s really stressing about.

That’s what she’ll get better about.  Not get mad at me.

I think that’s what’s bothering her.

I mean, if there’s seats…

[it goes on like this.  I just couldn’t keep up with the inanity]