Mmm, negligence

Jennifer hasn’t spoken to Barbara in a week or so.  Jennifer called Rachel last night to see if she could babysit.  Barbara was on the phone and neither of them knew it.  Jennifer said it would only be until ten, then Rachel could leave.  The thing is, Jennifer wasn’t going to be back at ten.  “Well, they’ll just go to sleep after that,” she explained.  Then Brenda cut in and blew up at her about not taking care of her kids.  Jennifer got defensive, said, “I’m not talking to you about this.  I got somebody else to watch them.”   

 This has court case written all over it.

Cs make degrees

Barbara was talking to Rachel about her failing grades.  Rachel’s excuse was “I was tired, I didn’t feel like doing it.”  And Barbara accepted that.  I’m not saying she was happy about it, but she didn’t scold her or anything.  Granted, none of this should be happening on the phone while she’s at work, but…

That's why teachers earn the big bucks

Barbara’s talking about a five year old that she knows who “talks big.”  Barbara was surprised to hear her say that school was going to be “exciting.”  Eventually, Barbara said that she doesn’t even think the little girl is in preschool.  “I think her mom teaches her stuff.”  She said it like she was shocked at the concept.   

Concerned for the wrong reason

Barbara is giving Rachel the third degree about why she got a B on her AP Econ test.  She is wondering how she was able to get such a high grade when she is doing so poorly in the class.  I’m glad it was always the opposite with my parents. 

Tidbits

Barbara thinks her fish is smart because he floats to the surface when she gets the food out at the same time every day.  

So Jennifer left her kids alone the other day.  One of the neighbor kids came over and Sebastian ended up with two staples in his head because he "fell off a stool."  Now there is talk at the apartment complex of calling CPS.  

We just taught Barbara how to copy/paste on her computer.  First we had to teach her how to right click.  Forget about keyboard shortcuts.

Barbara is asking Rachel about her grades.  The funny part is, Barbara can’t even pronounce most of the classes she’s asking her about. Microkenomics?  Not sure I’m familiar with that one.  

Terry showed us some family photos he had taken at a department store.  I could have taken more appealing pictures of salted meats. 

Down goes Sherri

Barbara - Sherri sprang [sic] both her ankles!

She did, according to at least one doctor, sprain both her ankles.  This is round one of what will go on to be a very rocky relationship between Sherri and her employment. 

Character Introduction

Sherri

The receptionist.  A strange position for a department that has no other contact with customers directly, she answers phones and possibly greets visitors.  Sherri is a short woman with long, poofy, gray hair and some children who are too old to be living at home.  If she misses a day of work, Barbara fills in the role.  I've already seen two new receptionists in the time I've been here.  There's friction. 

A regular June Cleaver

Over the phone, Barbara is telling Jennifer to be a better mother.  That seems like appropriate work conversation. 

This is what Jennifer said, “How am I supposed to make my kids sleep.  I put them in their rooms so how am I supposed to know if they’re sleeping or not?”  What a mother.  And yes, she talks loudly enough for me to hear her. 

She says CPS “Won’t find nothin’” on her.  She’s a “good” mother and always there for her kids.  She went out to eat (drink was implied) last night and left the kids alone. 

“My friends are the only ones who keep me going?” Jennifer said.  What about her children?

Character Introduction

Jennifer

 

It's not unusual to know things about coworkers' families.  For example, the name of her oldest child (Jennifer), how old she is (30 something), where she lives (a block from Barbara), how many children she has (four; 11 (Kaylee), 8 (Daniel), 4 (Felipe), and 2 (Sebastian)).  
There are some things, however, that I was surprised to find out.  For instance, the father of Jennifer's children has been deported because he was here illegally.  Or that these children are often left to fend for themselves when Jennifer goes out.  It seems, or rather seemed, that these were things that should be kept to one's self.  Luckily for me, this isn't always the case. 

A Vue to be killed

Seconds after sitting down, Barbara started into it.  “Well, I made a big purchase this weekend.”  Then in a hushed voice, “I bought me a another vehicle.”

I’ve been tuning her out more recently.  She also hasn’t been at her desk much.  I’m glad though.  It’s the only way I can get any work done.  With being interrupted, intentionally or unintentionally, by Terry, if I were eavesdropping on her issues, I’d never get anything done.  Lucky for me, he doesn’t seem to be here this morning. 

 I got Barbara’s story, loud and clear.  As did anybody else working on my floor.  “I’m not sure yet if we really shoulda done it.  We just had to take the Malibu to the shop because the check engine light came on after we put some gas in it.  They said, for the light, the transmission pan that was leakin’, the brakes, and we didn’t even ask them to look at the brakes, near thousand dollars to fix all that.  We just asked them to fix the light.  And I’m not really sure, how do they know it wasn’t some freak thing with the light from the gas we put in?”  So we just pay for the light and go walk around the lot.  Then we find this little Saturn SUV thing.  It’s called a Vue.  It’s pretty cute.  There goes Reggie’s Social Security,” she said jokingly, but she wasn’t joking.  “But [Reggie] said, ‘You’ve lived without it before,’ and I was like I know.  But we’re gonna have to stop eatin out so much.  I’m still not convinced it was a good idea.”

“How much did you pay for it?” her desk partner asked, as if the gods themselves willed her to do so for my benefit.  And I’m really not sure what to make of her answer.  She said, “They were askin’ seventeen, but they dropped it to thirteen-somethin’.  But it ended up, with everything being like twenty-four.” What?  Seriously?  How does that work?  Eleven grand in extra fees and stuff?  I bet these two are a negotiator’s dream.  I bet there are dozens layers of undercoating on that car.  She said she got some extra insurance on it, which I think she meant was an extended warrantee.  But still, that’s a lot of money for a couple years of worry free* maintenance.  Regardless, $24,000 for a used SUV made by a company she didn’t even know was defunct.  This will not end well.

Dog gone

 Reggie took away Barbara’s dog.  He won’t tell them what he did with it.  He just keeps saying “nevermind.”  She doesn’t see think he put her down because everything he does she has to do it with him.  He said he took the dog to a place in Kansas.  She thinks he just dumped her off on the side of the road.  She called animal control to see if they had found the dog.  They asked her for her address, “I’m not givin’ them my address,” she laughed.  “If they find the dog, they’re liable to come fine us or something.”

Yes, ma’am, the punishment fits the crime.  Or maybe you should take your worthless husband out to the middle of nowhere and drop him off.  I wonder how many miles away she would be by the time she stopped laughing.  

You're on the right path

Barbara called the school because they marked Rachel absent in first hour.  She is able to see her daughter’s grades in real time.  Isn’t that terrifying?  Barbara said on this end of a phone call, “I don’t think my daughter has a teacher with that name.  Is it a substitute?” It’s not.  Barbara just didn’t know.  Which is strange because she constantly remarks on Rachel’s grades, she just doesn’t know how to do anything about it.  

For instance, she had been assigned a paper several weeks ago.  Because that’s how they prepare kids for college where papers will be due in a few days.  By dragging them out for weeks.  But Rachel hadn’t done any work on it.  Then, as goes the story, the teacher yelled at her.  Even “bugged out his eyes” at her.   But Barbara was trying to get hold of the teacher because her daughter just didn’t understand how to do the paper.  Rachel reportedly tried to stay during the lunch period one day, but the teacher said she had to go to lunch even though she doesn’t eat.  She’s actually been saving her lunch money but still asking her parents for money all the time.  

It’s hard to focus on one thing when I’m overhearing these phone calls. So much gets thrown at me.    

 

Willful ignorance

Barbara knows she speaks incorrectly.  In a phone conversation, in response to something on the other end of a telephone, she said, “It don’t matter.” She paused for the other person to speak and then, in a sigh, “Dooooesn’t maaatterrr.” So she knows she is ignorant.  Isn’t that mind blowing? 

A woman's work

It worries me that Barbara is the brains of that operation.  Reggie always has her call to take care of his business.  And by business I mean consulting with lawyers and the unemployment office and therapists and doctors.  If it weren’t for her, I don’t know where he’d be.  Probably in the pocket and on the pedestal of some other sucker of a woman. 

Stolen Conversations II

 Reggieeeeee.  No you don’t put bleach on colored clothes. 

[pause as he explains something] 

Well maybe it just depends on the material; I bet that’s what it is. 

[pause] 

Well yeah, with lighter colored stuff. 

[pause] 

Well, as long as it wasn’t none of my work clothes. 

Stolen Conversations

Sometimes I get snippets of conversations.  Out of context they are even more ridiculous than they were when I documented them.

Barbara: I called your counselor about that one class you didn’t know if you wanted to take.  What was it? – Language arts?

Pause while her youngest daughter talks on the other end.

Barbara: Don’t worry, you’ll do good.

[with reassurance like that, how could she not be?]

Barbara about her youngest daughter: Everyday she gives me a headache.  She’s such a brat.  I just hope I live long enough to see her have a family and kids and no money.  That’s all I ask.

[nothing could make a mother happier]

Margaret leaving early:  I’m out for the day, I have a visitation to go to.

Peon: Whose?

Margaret: Janet Doersky.  It starts at 6:00 but I want to get there before they start the rosary because I’m not a good catholic.

[I'd say she's got the hang of it]

John: “Our dog fell off the bed last night.”

Noreen: “Is that the end of the story or is there more to it?”

John: “No, that’s about it.  It was just funny.”

Noreen: “My son’s cat got run over this weekend.”

Matt: “Jesus Christ.”

 
 
 

 

Lowest common denominator

 We just had a meeting about teamwork.  Margaret asked if anyone had a word or a short phrase that illustrates an important aspect of teamwork.  I offered empathy and reciprocation.  After the meeting, Barbara told me I should use smaller words that she can understand. 

By any other name

Keep in mind this was relayed as a funny story.  

One night when Barbara was pregnant with her youngest daughter, her husband-at-the-tme was yelling at her loudly enough to draw the police.  They came and arrested him.  Later, Barbara went into labor. 

The next morning, he showed up at the hospital mad about having to spend the night on the floor of a jail cell.  “You had a rough night?” she asked.  “I had a baby!”  Then he got madder because, for some reason (which really illustrates the level of intelligence I’m dealing with here), she named her daughter Rachel West-Trumbo.  Her husband’s name was Trumbo.  Her EX-HUSBAND’s name was West.  Since Barbara wanted all her daughters to share a name, she extended the name of her ex-husband to her current husband’s daughter.  Since he was in jail at the time and not around to sign the birth certificate, he had no say.

And to this day, he still can’t remember her birthday.  Why do I know these things?

There's someone out there for everyone

Barbara just said, “I just thought I lost my bus pass.  Boy would Reggie have been mad.”  For those following along at home, Reggie is illiterate, alcoholic, unemployed, lazy, verbally abusive, and a terrible step-father.  He gets by on Barbara’s salary which can’t be that much. 

Then somebody said, “Yeah, then you’d have to pay for the bus every day.”

“Never mind that,” Barbara added, “he’d have to take me and pick me up every day.”

That’s right, the person who owes her for food, shelter, affection (ick), and god knows what else for the last several years, would be upset if he had to drive her to work for a couple weeks.  Jesus.  How do these people find mates?

The land of the litigious

Barbara got some medication for a sore under her nose.  She also had a sore in her mouth, so she put some of the medication in her mouth.  Now her face is numb.  Where did thought go?  And she called her illiterate, unemployed, sleep-til-noon husband to make sure they had enough information in case there ended up being a lawsuit.  Thisfuckingsociety.